The future's not ours to see....

it's already pass midnight.3 minutes to 1 a.m. actually.It's a quiet night.once in a while i can hear my dad's coughing from his room. It hit me straight to the heart.

Thinking of my dad, the number one cheerleader in my life.he is the one who always reminds me to be strong and always do good not only to others but also to myself . "Buat apa la dok penaya diri?" his usual words with his thick penang slang. hehehehe

i dunno why i am kinda emotional suddenly. thinking of what it wil be like without the MAN of my life. What would it be like without him...tak de sapa nak lawan gaduh..heheehe.

"eleh...pakai saja rugged...duit petrol bapak bayar" or "Eleh Pakai je rugged, assignment suruh bapak check"

or "eleh, pakai je rugged, duit mintak kat bapak" He always teases me with these words. It doesn't mean anything as its just our kind of way of bergurau. He didn't mind at all spending for us. He goes "ANYTHING FOR MY KIDS" BUt i felt sad to know that one day, i will still pakai rugged but will not able to 'minta duit' from him anymore because he will not be there anymore. This is a reality that i have to face whether i like it or not. Ya Allah.... apabila tiba harinya, kau kuatkanlah semangatku agar aku dapat menerima segalanya dengan tenang dan tabah. Just thinkingabout it makes me dizzy and starts tearing up...sebak la pulak.. the future's not ours to see.....

I am very close to my dad you see. VERY.  even before i was born, my mom predicted that i am a boy so i can teman my dad to go to surau and my sister can teman my mom. But i turn out to be a girl. hehehehe... BUt i did teman my dad everywhere. I cling on to him everywhere he goes since i was young till i masuk form one coz that time, Farhan dah selamat tiba di muka bumi ini hehehehehe. But it didn't end there. During school days, i'd make him do my lukisan of finish my lukisan or he would hrow out ideas on what to do or read my english essay before i submit to the teacher esok. even masuk Uni pun still lagi sometimes.

All my life, he is the man that understand how i work.. I guess  that's because he has the instruction manual of me hehehehehe Anak sapa? Anak M.O. ( he is famous with his initial in the organization he used to work with). I think he is one of a kinda Dad where he doesnt get angry even when i failed my papers in fact siap boleh Kawtim lagi to keep it as a secret. BUt then bukan tak kena basuh lepas tu siap la kena dgr M.O kasi lecture free hehehehehe. I think the right word is penyabar kot. coz i pun pernah lost his handphone once.. A brand new one summore.But he kept cool. ( mcm mcm kan karenah anak dia yang sorang ni hehehehehe) Tu tak masuk lagi cerita pasal anak dia yang nombor berapa ntah, call dari adelaide, crying hehehehe ( work stress and personal life stress)

Anak manja Ayah... Yes that me.. My sis too...

I luv my daddy !!!!

Ya Allah, engkau panjang kan lah umur kedua ibu dan bapaku, kurniakanlah kesihatan kepada mereka. Amin...